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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24573352">The Great Twisting</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/advanced_fanatic/pseuds/advanced_fanatic'>advanced_fanatic</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Bungou Stray Archives [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast), 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai-Typical Suicide References (Bungou Stray Dogs), Gen, M/M, Mori Ougai Being An Asshole (Bungou Stray Dogs), Not Really Character Death, but - Freeform, if i ever write a fic where dazai isn't soft for the ada assume i've died, or written something in beast universe, still technically counts i think, the major character death isn't...really a death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 09:07:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,982</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24573352</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/advanced_fanatic/pseuds/advanced_fanatic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>At age sixteen, Dazai had almost everything he'd ever wanted: a stable home and job, people he cared for and who cared about him, and freedom from Mori. He should have expected it to all come crashing down on him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dazai Osamu &amp; Izumi Kyouka &amp; Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Izumi Kyouka (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Mori Ougai (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Sakaguchi Ango (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Tanizaki Junichirou (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu &amp; Yosano Akiko (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu/Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Bungou Stray Archives [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1740364</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Dazai Osamu was a lot of things: sixteen years old, possibly illegally employed at the Magnus Institute, probably the laziest Archival Assistant in the history of Assistants, definitely the laziest person his boyfriend, Kunikida Doppo, had ever met, the only person to talk to the NotThem and make it out alive, the legal guardian of a young Avatar of the Hunt who honestly he had only befriended to figure out more about the Hunt but who was now one of the most important people in his life, the guardian of the aforementioned Hunt avatar’s best friend, who may or may not be an avatar of the Slaughter, really, </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> bad at saying no to the Hunt avatar’s kitten eyes whenever he turned into a tiger and used them, former adoptive son of the most famous serial killer ever to be caught, Oda Sakunosuke, and his (probably) soon-to-be ex-husband Sakaguchi Ango, a current recluse who Dazai was fairly certain was doing his best to become an avatar of the Lonely, former adoptive son/pet project of the Head of the Magnus Institute (which really made Dazai wonder, why the </span>
  <em>
    <span>actual fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> was he working there again?), and boyfriend to Kunikida Doppo. But out of all of these things that Dazai was, one thing that he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>was an idiot. And so when Mori approached him--him, specifically, not even bothering to go through Fukuzawa, Dazai’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>actual</span>
  </em>
  <span> boss--and asked him if he wanted to help him stop the world from ending, Dazai said no before the words were even completely out of his mouth. Dazai knew exactly what the price was for stopping an event--a ritual--like this. In fact, he had drawn up a plan for stopping this very ritual years ago, before he’d run away and gotten taken in by Odasaku. Back then, he would have jumped at the chance to be allowed to stop a ritual--it was basically suicide. Now, though, as much as he wanted to die, he couldn’t afford to. He had to put Atsushi and Kyouka through college first, and he had to beat Kunikida to a proposal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not that Dazai was planning on proposing when they were sixteen. That was ridiculously stupid and would only lead to Kunikida saying no. Besides, he had already seen a proposal plan in Kunikida’s Ideal notebook for when they were 23, and he knew </span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly</span>
  </em>
  <span> how he was going to wreck it: by proposing exactly five minutes before, right when Kunikida would be getting up the nerve to say something. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So yeah, Dazai had too much to do before dying to stop this ritual. Especially since this one in particular wouldn’t even be nice enough to let him die. Or, well, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>might</span>
  </em>
  <span> die. It was really unclear. Either every part of him except the bare bones of his personality would be stripped away and twisted together to create something new, in-fucking-sane, but still fundamentally </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>, or the foundation of who he was would be stripped away, and all that was left would be the masks he wore around other people. He wasn’t sure which, because this had never exactly been </span>
  <em>
    <span>done</span>
  </em>
  <span> before, but either way it wouldn’t exactly be fun for him, or for the few interpersonal relationships he’d managed to get going.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he’d refused, Mori had just smiled and said he’d find another candidate, which Dazai didn’t trust at all, which is why he was crouched in an adjacent room while Mori talked to Fukuzawa and Kunikida about the Great Twisting, wishing that he had Atsushi’s Hunt-enhanced senses helping him out here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you need an Archival Assistant to help you keep the Spiral from reshaping the world?” Fukuzawa asked, frowning. “Why are you handling this? It’s my understanding that stopping the rituals is the just of the Archivist.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, which is why I’m asking for an Archival Assistant for this. There is an avatar of the Desolation whose trust I’ve gained who is instrumental in destabilizing the ritual, and it would simply be impractical to ask him to work with you at this stage.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fukuzawa nodded, while Dazai internally bit back a curse. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chuuya</span>
  </em>
  <span> was going to be a part of this? What the </span>
  <em>
    <span>hell</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Did he want Soukoku to have one last hurrah before Dazai reconstructed himself? Or was he there to coerce whatever poor soul was sent to go into the Distortion? Or was he just a distraction? Chuuya wasn’t part of Dazai’s initial plan!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And who exactly were you thinking about taking?” Fukuzawa asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was going to ask Dazai, but it could be dangerous, and I don't know if he’d be comfortable with it,” Mori said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could go,” Kunikida volunteered. “It sounds interesting.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No</span>
  </em>
  <span>. No, nope, nope, nope, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>. This wasn’t happening. This seriously was not happening! Yosano knew Mori, she knew not to take anything he offered her, Ranpo was so deep in the Eye that he could see through any attempt at deceiving him, and besides he was smart enough anyway that that wasn’t necessary. But Kunikida...well, he definitely could see through this if he wanted to. But he had that damned hero complex, especially when it came to Dazai, so </span>
  <em>
    <span>of course</span>
  </em>
  <span> he would volunteer for Dazai! Of fucking course! Now Dazai had no </span>
  <em>
    <span>choice</span>
  </em>
  <span> but to go, becoming the Distortion would be awful for Kunikida!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I’ll go!” Dazai called, striding into the room, making sure he didn't look like he was freaking out internally. “It would be my genuine pleasure to see Chuuya again, after all.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mori smiled at him, as if he knew this would happen all along. Bastard. “Excellent. We’ll leave in three days.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mori turned, and left, and Dazai bit back about a dozen swear words. He had three days to find someone to take care of Atsushi and Kyouka, three days to say his goodbyes to Kunikida and Odasaku and Yosano and Ranpo and Fukuzawa and Atsushi and Kyouka and maybe even Ango. Three days before he was changed forever, ripped irreparably in two, destroyed in a way he wasn’t sure if he wanted any of his people to see. But they would. Of course he would. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Three days? That’s short notice,” Kunikida said. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know, my life is so hard,” Dazai moaned, draping himself over his boyfriend. Kunikida rolled his eyes, opening his planner—his Ideal notebook—and starting to write in Dazai’s absence. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He’ll never see me again after this</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Dazai thought. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How long will you’ve gone?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai shrugged. “Dunno. At least a month.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kunikida winced. “How are you going to clear that with your teachers?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll tell them it’s a family emergency,” said Dazai, who didn’t go to school and refused to let Kunikida know. It wasn’t like it would matter soon, anyway. He should just tell him. Rip off the bandaid. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Smart,” Kunikida said. “Do you have anyone to take notes for you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll just ask Yosano,” Dazai replied. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She goes to school online,” Kunikida said, frowning. “And she’s in college.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m in pretty advanced classes. Our curriculum’s basically the same.” It wasn’t a lie, not really. Dazai had graduated high school when he was twelve and still living with Odasaku; he had his Bachelor’s degree basically finished now and had been planning on getting it done by going to college with Kunikida. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Although now he never would. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well...if you’re sure…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure I’m sure!” Dazai flashed him a bright grin. “Would I </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> lie about that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Kunikida said flatly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mean,” Dazai pouted. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Tell him, tell him, tell him.</span>
  </em>
  <span> The words chased themselves around his head. He stayed quiet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go talk to Yosano now,” Kunikida told him, pushing him towards the other room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What if I want to hug you?” Dazai said. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t procrastinate!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai groaned theatrically, but went over to where Yosano and Ranpo were sorting through boxes of statements. The four of them had made a game of this, seeing who could tell which statements were real with the most accuracy. Ranpo and Kunikida were by far the best, Yosano rapidly on her way to becoming a full-blown avatar of the End and Dazai has already decided that becoming an avatar of any Fear was not for him. Way too much work. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He would never play that game again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yosano, I need to talk to you,” he said. “It’s important.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dazai, I told you, I’m not going to </span>
  <em>
    <span>make </span>
  </em>
  <span>the veins go around you—“</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s important,” Ranpo said, frowning. “I can finish up here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why, what is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The Great Twisting is coming,” Dazai said quietly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yosano looked up at him. “You’re not…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am. It’s...it’s why I have to talk to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She nodded, face serious, and stood. The two of them walked silently into another room. Yosano locked the door, and Dazai slumped into the chair usually reserved for statement givers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why did you agree?” she asked. “You </span>
  <em>
    <span>swore</span>
  </em>
  <span> that you wouldn’t get involved with any of those. You aren’t alone here, there are people depending on you! Atsushi, Kyouka—and weren’t you talking about marrying Kunikida one day? Why would you throw everything away like that?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So I am going to die. It’ll probably wear my corpse, then,” Dazai sighed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why the hell did you agree to it?!” she shouted. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because if I didn’t he would have taken Kunikida!” Dazai shot back. “And he doesn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span>, not like we do. He thinks I’ll come back. He wanted me to talk to you about making sure I’m not missing any </span>
  <em>
    <span>schoolwork</span>
  </em>
  <span>, for God’s sake!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then,” said Yosano, “what if you </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> go back?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t,” said Dazai. “I’ll be dead, or something he couldn’t—I don’t want to see him look at me and see a monster.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He wouldn’t do that,” she told him. “He’s better than that, you know he is. He doesn’t treat </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span> any different, and I’m an avatar of the End.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s way different from a limb of the </span>
  <em>
    <span>Spiral</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Dazai said. “Yosano, I--I don’t even know if I’ll still be </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span> afterwards, or if it’ll just wear my </span>
  <em>
    <span>corpse</span>
  </em>
  <span> around like some sort of fancy suit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was quiet for a few moments. “I don’t see any of the roots around you, if that makes you feel any better,” she told him. “But the line gets blurry around things like the Spiral and the Stranger--the Stranger! That’s it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s it?” Dazai said. Usually he knew what Yosano or anyone else meant when they came to some sort of revelation, usually he had already come to the same revelation and was waiting with Ranpo for them to figure it out (the two of them couldn’t steal all the Archival thunder, after all), but this time he was totally at a loss. It wasn’t a very comforting feeling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ok, you remember how the NotThem has totally been squatting in Artifact Storage ever since you beat it at a drinking contest last year?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yeah,” said Dazai. “Actually I think I even learned its name, like, its real actual name that it goes by. It has a sister, but she’s an avatar of the Vast, so they haven’t seen each other since before Fukuchi bound him to the table.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ouch,” said Yosano. “But you guys are on good terms, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai shrugged. “Good enough? We drink together sometimes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, what if you didn’t have to disappear? What if you came back entirely unscathed from the Great Twisting?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“As much as I’d love for that to happen, it’s literally impossible. I’m going to become the Distortion, and there’s nothing we can do about it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We can keep Kunikida and your siblings from ever finding out, though,” she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’d still be gone.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You would be, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dazai Osamu</span>
  </em>
  <span> doesn’t have to be. Remember what the NotThem’s whole </span>
  <em>
    <span>thing</span>
  </em>
  <span> is?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Replacing people,” Dazai breathed. “Yosano Akiko, you are a </span>
  <em>
    <span>genius</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, yeah, I know.” She looked pleased, though, so Dazai continued praising her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you. You are so amazing. Have I told you how amazing you are lately?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You could stand to do it more,” she said. “But right now, you have a sentient table to go talk to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai laughed, but headed out anyway. Kunikida looked up as he passed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did it go well?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai shrugged. “Let me tell you when I get back from Artifact Storage!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He raised his eyebrows, but chucked fondly. “Alright. Don’t die up there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll do my best!” He waved at his boyfriend and hurried up the stairs, flipping off the ceiling where Mori might be watching out of habit. He rushed up and through to Artifact Storage, and then into a side room where the NotThem’s table was. He carefully closed and locked the door behind him (even if he was sure that the thing wouldn’t harm </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>, there was no telling whether or not it would go after the other employees) before knocking on the table. “Hey, you hungry?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Starving. Why?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai turned. The area behind him was empty, but when he turned back to the table a red-headed teenager in a sweater and jeans was perched on top of it, grinning at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Finally decided to set me free?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Something like that. Have you ever heard of the Great Twisting?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The NotThem wrinkled its nose. “Spiral ritual. Disgusting. Why?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m the one who’s going to stop it, by fusing with the Distortion.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seriously?” he said. “Dude, no fair. You’re, like, my only friend, especially since there’s no way Naomi  is coming here, like, </span>
  <em>
    <span>ever</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Who’s gonna give me Archival gossip now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai took a deep breath. “Well,” he said, “if you accept my proposal, everyone.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It frowned. “What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I want you to replace me. After...after I fuse with the Distortion, I can open a door under your table and bring you to Sannikov Land, and you can come out and pretend to be me. Nobody will remember the real me, and you can take care of Kunikida and Atsushi and Kyouka and everything. Nobody will be the wiser.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Atsushi avatar-of-the-Hunt Atsushi?” the NotThem asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep, that’s him!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You...you do realize he’s one of the things capable of killing me...right?” it said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes. </span>
  <em>
    <span>And</span>
  </em>
  <span> he’d be able to smell the difference. I’m terrible at fooling Hunt avatars, you know. Scent is one of the most powerful triggers of memory, and you two are close enough that he’ll never be fooled. And unlike you, I don’t want to die.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll tell Atsushi beforehand, then. You can pick someone else to scare, who won’t kill you. Like...oh, Chuuya! You can’t be killed by </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chuuya</span>
  </em>
  <span>, can you? And it’ll be </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> funny!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I can do that,” it said. “You’ll probably need something to laugh at anyway, it’s really painful becoming a monster.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right, you weren’t always…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A face-stealing monster?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was actually going to say sentient table, but that works too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It huffed out a laugh. “Yeah. I mean, I was a normal guy, like you or...are there any actually normal people that you know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Odasaku, but he’s kind of...not around anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It nodded. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to prey on a jailbird. That’s just cruel.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have to visit him at least once a month, though,” said Dazai. “He gets lonely. Nobody likes him, you know, because of all the stuff that happened. Ango doesn’t come anymore, for whatever reason, and it’s not like he and Atsushi ever knew each other all that well, or even got along in the first place, because Atsushi can smell blood and stuff, so I’m the only one visiting anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He nodded. “As long as I can see Naomi, too. It’s been way too long.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> you guys become servants of different entities, anyway?” Dazai asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He grinned. “Oh, that’s a story. So, hundreds of years ago, right, we were just normal people, Tanizaki Junichiro and Tanizake Naomi. She started getting involved with the Vast when she was a painter’s apprentice. He had this nice big painting of an open sky...Meanwhile I just beat the former NotThem in a fistfight and was forced to replace it. Not fun, and very painful. Which is why I think it’s a good thing that you think my tormenting Chuuya will be funny. You’ll need something to laugh at. You’ll need someone to go to, too, now that I think about it…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not an option,” Dazai said. “You’ll be changing everyone’s memories, remember?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your Ango,” Tanizaki said. “He’s an avatar of the Lonely, is he not?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai stared at it for a second while he reviewed every interaction he and Ango had had since Gide had killed the orphans and destroyed the library. That...made a lot of sense, actually. The fucking idiot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guess so,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” Tanizaki replied, “what’s lonelier than madness?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai blinked at him for a moment. “You’re saying that I can preserve Ango’s memories of me, if I get to him fast enough.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’ll probably end up remembering both versions of you, but yes. You should probably talk to him about this beforehand, too, so he doesn’t think he’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> gone crazy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai nodded. Other than Odasaku, Ango was probably his first choice for someone to see him in pain. Fukuzawa was closer to him now, (especially if Ango was melting away into fog) but there was too high a chance of one of the other Assistants seeing him like that, which, </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “If I can find him, I will.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Otherwise you’ll just burst in on him and freak him out?” Tanizaki said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai shrugged. “If he thinks it was instinct, he’ll be more likely to let me stay. Besides, I don’t even know if I </span>
  <em>
    <span>will</span>
  </em>
  <span> go to him. Who knows what I’ll become?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dunno,” said Tanizaki. “But at the very least it’ll be interesting.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Dazai came home that evening, Atsushi was curled up like a cat under the windowsill while Kyouka read </span>
  <em>
    <span>Charlotte’s Web</span>
  </em>
  <span> next to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, little kitten,” Dazai said. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Atsushi raised his head with  a little </span>
  <em>
    <span>mrrrp</span>
  </em>
  <span> sound, and Dazai would’ve cooed at the way his eyes were a solid yellow, predator’s slit pupils rounding out when he saw him. For a split second, his ears were tufts of black and white on the top of his head before they returned to their human position. He would’ve cooed, but today was the furthest thing from normal and teasing Atsushi was the furthest thing from his mind. Kyouka looked up from her book as he moved, but he smiled at her and patted her hair and she went back to reading as Atsushi followed Dazai into another room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s wrong?” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m going to die and be replaced by the NotThem, and I need you not to kill it, because it’s going to take care of you and Kyouka when I can’t anymore, ok?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What</span>
  </em>
  <span>?!” Atsushi shrieked. His eyes were human again, purple and yellow and rapidly filling up with tears and Dazai had never felt like more of an asshole.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhh! Shhh, shhhh, it’ll be ok, I promise. I won’t be gone gone, I’m just...going to be different, and I won’t be able to take care of you guys anymore. But I’ll come back and visit, I promise.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The NotThem erases people’s memories, though!” Atsushi protested. “I--I won’t know you anymore!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know, but even Tanizaki can’t fool your nose,” Dazai said. “You’ll be able to smell that it isn’t me. And you’ll remember this conversation--hopefully--so you’ll know not to kill it. It’ll take care of you, Atsushi, you and Kyouka. You’re only fourteen, you can’t support yourself.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re</span>
  </em>
  <span> only sixteen!” Atsushi shot back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You need to go to school, you’re behind a few years and if you don’t--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s really easy to lie, though,” Atsushi seethed. “You’ve been doing it to Kunikida since we met him!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That isn’t fair,” Dazai said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, it isn’t fair for you to go off and die, either!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The door cracked open, and Kyouka peered in. “Dazai’s dying? Is he sick?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“In the head, maybe,” Atsushi muttered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have to die to stop the Spiral’s ritual,” Dazai said. “I’ve arranged for the NotThem to take my place, so it’ll be like I’m not even gone! Except Atsushi will be able to smell that it isn’t me. So I’m asking him not to kill it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kyouka immediately teared up. Dazai was honestly impressed--he hadn’t thought that a Slaughter avatar was capable of crying, even a tiny one like Kyouka. “But--but what about </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” she asked. “Why don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> get to remember you?”</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>Shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Dazai was </span>
  <em>
    <span>terrible</span>
  </em>
  <span> in situations like this. He awkwardly hugged her, and said, “Atsushi won’t remember me either, he’ll just be able to smell that something’s off about me. That’s why I’m telling him about this now, so he doesn’t do anything rash. But I </span>
  <em>
    <span>promise</span>
  </em>
  <span>, once I’m able to, I’ll come and check in on you, ok? I won’t be the same, but I can promise that I’ll never, ever stop caring about the two of you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That, at least, Dazai was sure of, whether he was stripped to his bare bones or just his masks. Because he adored Atsushi and Kyouka (and Kunikida, and Akutagawa (whether he admitted that to himself or not), and Yosano, and Ranpo, and Shachou), but also because he pretended that he only lightly cared about them--like he would teasingly help Atsushi with his homework, but not stay up all night worrying about how well the boy was adjusting to actual school, like he would read Kyouka a bedtime story but didn’t have sixteen different contingency plans for if (when) she stabbed one of her classmates.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then why are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>leaving</span>
  </em>
  <span> us?” Atsushi asked, sounding like a wounded animal. Dazai put a hand on his shoulder and Atsushi grabbed him and squeezed, joining Kyouka in the hug. “Can’t someone else do it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mori was going to make Kunikida do it,” Dazai told him, “but he’d make a </span>
  <em>
    <span>terrible</span>
  </em>
  <span> piece of the Spiral. Can you imagine how much it would mess up his Ideal? I’m the much better option. He’s worth a lot more than I am, and so are the two of you. Which is why I’m having Tanizaki take care of you. He promised to do his best.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span> his best,” Atsushi said. “We want </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We can’t always get what we want, Atsushi,” said Dazai. “This is the best out of a lot of very bad options.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know,” he mumbled. “I know, but I don’t like it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who does?” Dazai whispered.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the end, Dazai didn’t tell Ango. He didn’t want to give him the opportunity to say no, and he felt that if they were to see each other, they’d get into another screaming match--or Ango would just fade away into the Lonely, like he didn’t even care about Dazai anymore. That would hurt like a knife to the ribs, and Dazai thought that if that happened he wouldn’t go to Ango and he’d end up embarrassing himself in front of everyone in the Archive. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>(Even if they wouldn’t remember him to mock him.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Atsushi and Kyouka had gone to say goodbye, and both had bawled all over him before he went over to Kunikida.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, I’ll take care of them while you’re gone,” Kunikida told him. “I have schedules written out for them right here, see?” He flipped open his Ideal. “They’ll be just--mphh!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai had cut him off by kissing him. He pulled back and grinned at the flustered Kunikida. “I love you, you know. I don’t think I’ll ever stop,” he said--the closest thing to a goodbye he could give--and turned and ran up the gangplank onto the ship.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, idiot!” Kunikida shouted after him. “I love you too!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai pasted a grin on his face and tightened his fingers around the drawstring bag that held his favorite mementos of his relationships with Kunikida and Atsushi and Kyouka and Yosano and Ranpo and tried not to think about how that love would be for someone else, soon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The boat ride seemed to take both an eternity and an instant. Dazai and Chuuya fought the whole way there, of course. By the time they reached Sannikov Land, Dazai had lost count of the amount of times they’d set fire to the ship. Mori had stayed out of his way, mostly--thank God--but Chuuya kept trying to have a serious conversation about Dazai’s upcoming death, which, </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>. They were </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> doing that. He had barely survived a conversation about it with Atsushi and Kyouka, who he lived and he knew loved </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He and Chuuya </span>
  <em>
    <span>hated</span>
  </em>
  <span> each other. Sure, they had been friends once, years ago, but that was all gone now. It had crashed and burned when he’d run away to Odasaku, and honestly, that was how he liked it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It didn’t last, of course. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the world was twisting, and the three of them stood in front of an impossibly plain, impossibly enticing yellow door and Dazai was about to open it, Chuuya grabbed his wrist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, shitty mackerel,” he said. “I’ll miss you, ok?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dazai laughed. “I’ll be back before you know it, chibi,” he said. “Don’t go all sappy on me, it would ruin your reputation!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Asshole! You’re going to die!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will not! You’ll see, dumbass!” And with that, Dazai wrenched open the door and dashed through.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He immediately regretted this. The hallways were bright, and garish, and seemed to change every time he looked around. The door he had gone through had vanished, of course, and it was no use trying to make sense of this; he just had to follow his map and so he did, walking and climbing and breaking mirrors and turning and twisting and twisting and twisting and twisting and turning and twisting and his coat that had been handed to him when he walked onto the island the island the island the hallway the suffocating heat of the coat that he shrugged off and with it, tumbling from his fingers his hands his arms his fingers his long long too long fingers a lumpy drawstring bag of memories of memories and family but there was no family here his family his family family family he had to keep going for his family (he couldn’t remember their faces had they ever had faces did he have a face) he had to keep going he had to keep going going going gone--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dazai!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He (he?) looked and saw a man, long blond hair tied back in a ponytail, a vest and slacks and dress shoes, a beautiful man, staring at him (it? him) like he (it he it he) was the last rock in a storm, a lighthouse, a safe harbor but </span>
  <em>
    <span>why</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and what was the </span>
  <em>
    <span>name</span>
  </em>
  <span> he had said</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dazai, is that...is that really you?” the man said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who are you?” he it it he said because Dazai seemed right, but it also didn’t, and he couldn’t shake the feeling that if he it he stepped through the mirror to the beautiful man everything would be ok and stop twisting twisting twisting but then his family would be in trouble his family his </span>
  <em>
    <span>family</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s me, Kunikida--God, have you been here since we were sixteen, you don’t look like you’ve aged a </span>
  <em>
    <span>day</span>
  </em>
  <span>! Come on, I’ll help you get out of here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can’t,” he it he Dazai said. “Have to keep going. Protect my family. They’re all that matters. They’re the only thing that’s important.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your family,” Kunikida (but he didn’t seem like Kunikida, too tall, filled out, grown up) said. “Can you tell me about them?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Dazai said (because Dazai fit it fit whether he it was it or he it fit so Dazai chose it) “kitten, and soft baby girl, and I love him, and alone, and he killed for me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Those didn’t seem completely right, but they were the closest Dazai could remember them, thoughts and memories twisting twisting twisting away </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kunikida-man’s face twisted (twisting twisting twisted) up and he whispered, “I love you too.” which was weird because he wasn’t one of Dazai’s family, Dazai would have recognized him if he was right?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Dazai wanted to go through the mirror to him but the map said not to and Dazai had to protect Dazai’s family, what was it doing here if not protecting its family, so Dazai stepped away from the mirror and followed the map and twisted and twisted and turned and felt all at once glorious madness and terrible pain wrack it and tear it apart and push it back together for an eternity and a second, as the hallways the hallways the twisting turning hallways </span>
  <em>
    <span>became</span>
  </em>
  <span> Dazai and somewhere in an instant of remembrance and plan it opened a door beneath a spiderwebbed table and a boy with red hair and a cream sweater with a red hoodie knotted around his waist looked at it so sadly and said, “Remember, Dazai, go to Ango, he’ll help you,” Ango Ango Angoangoango Ango was Alone, Ango was Lonely, Ango was part of its family he would help he could make the hurt go away and as the boy with red hair stepped out into the freezing Sannikov Land that was rapidly vanishing, a Door appeared in the wall of Moorland House, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>what is more lonely than madness</span>
  </em>
  <span> it stumbled out in front of a shocked foggy man with big round glasses.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ango,” it said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The man looked at him, eyes wide with shock and tasty fear. "...Dazai?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then the pain overwhelmed it once more.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here is the second chapter! I’d like to give a special shoutout to Chimeara—your wonderful comment really helped motivate me to write this :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Moorland House never changed. It was one of the things that made it so delightfully lonely—bookshelves full of dusty, mundane volumes or just plain dust, picture frames of people dead or gone, extremely uncomfortable chairs, a window cracked just enough to let cold air and fog in, doors with heavy locks perfect for keeping people out, and canned meals that tasted like they were pretending to be full of the love and happiness that came from having a family.</p><p>So when the bright yellow door appeared in the living room, inviting and just asking to be opened, Ango noticed it right away. He also noticed when, less than a moment later, something began eroding at his memories of Dazai and trying to replace them with a skinny ginger boy. Dazai was suicidal, annoying, a genius, one of the best friends Ango had ever had, back when he'd had friends. This other boy was mentally healthy, kind, of average intelligence, and (according to the new memories) had never been very close to Ango. That wasn't Dazai. That <em>was not</em> Dazai, and maybe forgetfulness was Lonely, but Ango's memories of Dazai and Odasaku (the <em>real</em> Dazai and Odasaku) hurt him every day, made him lonely, made him a better avatar of the Lonely, and if Dazai were to be replaced with this redheaded boy who had (in these obviously false memories) never been close to Ango in the first place, that would hurt less simply because he had lost less.</p><p>And then the yellow, welcoming door swung open, and someone who looked like the first Dazai, stretched and distorted, stumbled  out.</p><p>"AnNGO," Dazai (or the thing that looked like Dazai) said.</p><p>"Dazai?" Ango said, unable to believe his eyes. Had he been trapped in the Distortion's corridors? If so, for how long? Was this why he had stopped contacting Ango--not because he didn't want to, but because he was physically unable to?</p><p>"YeS, tHAt Is...THat iS Me. I aAm daZAI. BuT tHe dAZai THat UsEd to bE...wHo kNOws? dID I bEcoME Him? oR dId hE beCOME Me?"</p><p>"The Great Twisting," said Ango, with dawning horror. "Dazai went into your corridors to stop it, then."</p><p>"yES. anD thEn..." The thing that was what remained of Dazai's face twisted up, as if it were in terrible pain. The part of Ango that still thought of it as Dazai hurt for it, ached to help it. The rest of him knew that this thing was wearing Dazai's corpse and it probably wanted him to feel for it, wanted him to pity it and help it as though it really were Dazai. He felt fog twisting in his chest, choking him. Maybe if things were different he could have saved Dazai.</p><p>"And then you ate him and wore his corpse and came traipsing into my house, what, to mock me?"</p><p>"nO," it said, "No, I...hE lOVEd YoU. He LOVed yOU a LOt, aNd he tHOuGHt YOu loVeD hIm toO And woULd hElP Me nOW tHAt I'vE beCOmE hIm."</p><p>"You're lying," Ango said, icy guilt trembling through him. "You and Dazai, you're <em>not</em> the same, and he <em>didn't</em> love me. He couldn't! Not after everything that happened."</p><p>"hE dId," said the thing wearing Dazai's corpse. "I coUldN't haVE COme HeRe iF He dIdN't."</p><p>"What are you talking about?"</p><p>"YouR hOuSe, it'S So LoNelY. tHERE Is sO mUCh LONEly In evERythIng. onLy One THing cAn buRN THRoUgH thE LoNElY."</p><p>"You're not saying that you love me," Ango said, vaguely horrified. This was his life now. He had thought that after Dazai and Odasaku had left, things would stop getting weird. But he was wrong. Of course he was wrong. Great.</p><p>"DazaI lovED YoU, aNd hE bECaMe mE," it said. "I...Do noT kNOw whAt ThingS He feELs ReMaIn In mE. It hURtS."</p><p>Ango was vividly reminded of two conversations he, Odasaku, and Dazai had had, years ago, when the library was still going well and things were happy.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"The Spiral ritual is called the Great Twisting, right?" Odasaku said, tracing a fractal on the cover of a spiral-bound notebook he had taken off the wall.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Don't touch that!" Ango exclaimed, snatching it away from him. "You don't know what could happen!"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"It's fine, Ango," Dazai called, hanging around one of the shelves. "That's just the one that makes every mirror look like a funhouse mirror when you read it. You can undo the effects by reading it backwards. It's pretty fun, actually."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You had better not have been reading it," Ango threatened.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"My reflection has been upside down for the past week and it's the most I've liked looking in the mirror, ever," Dazai bragged.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Ango groaned, and was about to try to convince Dazai to undo whatever it was he'd done to his reflection when Odasaku asked again, "So is the Great Twisting the Spiral's ritual?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yup!" Dazai said. "It hasn't happened yet, but it should be easy enough to undo. I made the plan for dealing with it, and I'm excited to see how it plays out. You know the Distortion?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"The magical door you're obsessed with?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"They're a sentient hallway and I for one think that's very sexy of them," Dazai informed him. "But anyway, I'm pretty sure that if someone Eye-touched were to lose themself in the halls of the Distortion without getting digested, they would fuse with it, which would be a large enough shock to the system that the ritual would fall apart."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"What would happen to the person, though?" Odasaku asked. "Fusing with the Distortion...that sounds pretty painful."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"It does," Ango said. "I think one of two things would happen: since the Spiral deals with madness and lies they'd lose everything but whatever lies they tell about themself, or they'd lose everything except for whatever the deepest truth about themself is, and everything else would be twisted all around."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Either way," Dazai said, "it would be extremely interesting to watch."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I wouldn't want to see that," Odasaku said. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dazai sighed, before giving Ango puppy dog eyes, looking almost like the eleven year old he was. "What about you, Ango? Would you watch it with me?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Ango hesitated for a moment. He knew that he probably shouldn't encourage those tendencies of Dazai's, but the Spiral ritual was a few years out yet and he was pretty curious what would happen to whatever poor soul was fed into the Distortion. He nodded. "Sure, as long as we can take a record for the Library. We shouldn't just keep these dangerous books here, especially if we want to be a resource that rivals the Magnus Institute."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Deal!" Dazai cheered. He saluted Ango and Odasaku and vanished back into the shelves.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>A year or two prior, Ango, Odasaku, and Dazai were sorting through the books they'd managed to collect. The list of Natsume's Fourteen was spread out in front of them, and Odasaku was keeping Dazai from opening some of the more dangerous books. He got an opportunity to try for one, though, when Odasaku got a call from the daycare his kids were at. He leaned forward and reached for a book with a soft grey cover. Ango whisked it away from him.</em>
</p><p><em>"Don't touch that! </em>A Disappearance<em> will send you into the Lonely, and we wouldn't be able to get you back from there! You'd be all alone until you died!"</em></p><p>
  <em>"Dying wouldn't be so bad, though," Dazai mused. "Besides, you guys would be able to get me back, right? Mori said that the only thing that can burn through the Lonely is love, and you guys love me, don't you?" The nine year old's eyes softened with doubt, and Ango reached out to ruffle his hair.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Of course we do," he said. "But still, it's one of the books, which might make the Lonely's grip on you stronger than if you fell into it naturally."<br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dazai sighed, but stopped reaching for the books, leaning his head on Ango's shoulder in a rare show of affection as they continued sorting the books.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>"...Yeah," Ango said. "I'm sure it does."</p><p>He reached for the thing that Dazai had become, and pulled it into his arms. It seemed to shrink to nine-year-old Dazai's size, although when he looked at it, it was just as tall as it had always been. </p><p>"Why did you come here, to me, specifically?" Ango asked. "You were closer with Odasaku, and the Archivist, and Nakajima and Izumi."</p><p>"YoU aRe LoNeLy," Dazai said, "AnD wHaT iS lOnElIer tHAn mADnESs? AnD reMEMbERing hIm, wHEn NOboDy ElsE wIlL, eXcePt ChUUyA, aNd ReMeMbErInG TaniZAki'S DAZAi, wheN EvErYoNe eXCepT ChuuYA dOeS toO...tHAT's cRAzY, THat'S weIrD, That'S LoneLy, rIgHt?"</p><p>Ango thought about it. Then he realized that even if he couldn't twist this into somehow serving his patron, he would be doing this anyway, so it didn't really matter. He told Dazai so, and it blinked up at him, and it's mouth shifted into an impossible smile.</p><p>"ThAT maKes nO SenSE," it said. "I aGRee coMpleTelY."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Moorland House never changed. It was one of the things that made it so delightfully lonely—bookshelves full of dusty, mundane volumes or just plain dust, picture frames of people dead or gone, extremely uncomfortable chairs, a window cracked just enough to let cold air and fog in, doors with heavy locks perfect for keeping people out, canned meals that tasted like they were pretending to be full of the love and happiness that came from having a family, and a welcoming yellow door that moved from room to room but never vanished from the house. Sometimes people would come out of the doors, minds unraveling, and Ango would serve them canned foods, and before their desperate gratitude started to fade, he sent them into the Lonely. He and Dazai would juggle victims like this, feeding, until one of them inevitably died. Ango could still feel the fog pressing in on him, but Dazai's presence burned it off--never too far, but it was a comfortable cycle.</p><p>One day of this, someone knocked on Ango's door. He opened it to see the redheaded Dazai knockoff standing there.</p><p>"Hey, Ango! Been a while, hasn't it?"</p><p>"I have literally never met you before in my life. Please leave."</p><p>He kept grinning, almost grotesque in his cheerfulness. "What are you talking about? We're <em>old friends</em>, aren't we?"</p><p>"You and I both know that isn't true. Leave, or I'll see if I can feed a limb of the Stranger to my patron."</p><p>The boy--the NotThem--sighed. "Fine. Just...is Dazai here? How is it doing?"</p><p>Ango frowned. "Why do you care?"</p><p>"Dazai Osamu was my friend, as hard as it is for you to believe. I want to see how he's doing now that he's like me."</p><p>"Dazai isn't anything like you."</p><p>"Dazai because the Distortion. I became the NotThem. It's the only other being that I know of who went through the same thing that I did. I think I could help it."</p><p>"What do you mean?" Ango asked.</p><p>"I used to be human too, until I got into a fight with the previous NotThem. I beat it and ended up taking its place. I still remember how painful it was, and I want to help Dazai, since he's my friend."</p><p>Ango paused for a few moments. "Wait there," he told the monster, before closing the door and going to knock on Dazai's door, which had migrated to just behind him over the course of the conversation. It swung open.</p><p>"Dazai, do you want to see the NotThem?" he asked.</p><p>"Tanizaki is it's name," Dazai replied. "And I think so. It was a friend to Dazai. And it helped me get to you after I became Dazai."</p><p>"Do you want to talk to it?" Ango asked.</p><p>Dazai hummed. "It was a friend to Dazai. And it knows how Kunikida and Atsushi and Kyouka are doing. I want to know how they're doing. After finding them, Dazai was never without them for more than a week. It has been nearly six months since Dazai left. I am worried about them, I think."</p><p>"You could always check on them yourself. You know you're capable of it."</p><p>Dazai shook its head. "I don't want them to see me. Dazai was good to them, he loved them and I love them too, but...I can't. I'm not the same Dazai."</p><p>"I don't care," Ango said.</p><p>"They will. They don't remember him. All they'll see is another monster."</p><p>Ango sighed. "I'm sorry."</p><p>Dazai shook its head. "They will not mourn this way."</p><p>"Still. I'm sorry that you're hurting."</p><p>"You are very strange," Dazai said. "I have decided. I want to speak to Tanizaki."</p><p>"Alright," said Ango. "If you change your mind, just tell me, ok?"</p><p>"oK," Dazai said.</p><p>Ango walked over and opened the door. The NotThem--Tanizaki--was still standing there, looking nervous. Moorland House was a very off-putting place. "Dazai said it wants to talk to you, so you may come in," he told it. He then stepped aside just slightly so that it had to squeeze past him to get in. Yes, Dazai had said it wanted to speak to it. However, as an avatar of the Lonely, Ango had a duty to make everyone interacting with him as uncomfortable as possible, and he was not going to shirk it just because this monster was a friend of Dazai's.</p><p>"hELLo, tanIZaKi," Dazai said. "hOW aRe KUnIkiDA AnD AtSUsHI aND kYoUKA DoINg?"</p><p>"Kunikida's doing well," Tanizaki said, "although I had to kind of...erase your whole love confession from his mind because I'm not the person he fell in love with, and while he is a pretty cool dude, I don't love him, not like you do. Kyouka...was nice to me for the thirty minutes before Atsushi came home from school and then they both teamed up to try to kill me until I gave them their real memories back. I'm having trouble explaining to Kunikida and the other Archives people why I've been basically living in the Archives. Atsushi and Kyouka said that I wasn't to come near them until you explicitly say that I'm safe to be around. I haven't seen them in months and judging by my credit card bills the healthiest thing they've eaten in the past four months is chazuke and a crepe with strawberries on it. Otherwise, they've been living entirely off of Oreos and soda."</p><p>"hmmMMM. I sHOulD ChecK Up oN tHeM. MmmAYbE."</p><p>"They wouldn't hate you," Tanizaki said. "They miss you a lot."</p><p>"I aM A MONsTEr."</p><p>"Atsushi literally hunts people for sport," Tanizaki said.</p><p>"I'm fairly certain that everyone affiliated with the powers hunts people for sport," Ango said dryly. "The Magnus Archives may be an exception to that, but that's only because they tend to be fed a steady diet of statements caused by the rest of us."</p><p>"I don't <em>hunt</em>," said Tanizaki, offended. "I just...eat people's lives."</p><p>"tHAT Is VeRY sIMilAr," Dazai said.</p><p>Tanizaki rolled it's eyes. "Not while I'm bound to the table, it's not! I just have to take what I can get now."</p><p>"dO NoT woRrY. soOn YOu wiLL bE AbLe To USe My haLlWaYs tO HuNT."</p><p>"Yeah, if your dumb boyfriend ever pulls his head out of his ass and realizes that I'm not you," Tanizaki said. "Which, by the way, doesn't seem like it's happening any time soon. I mean, he's a Archival Assistant, a servant of the Eye. I wasn't expecting him to have, like, Archivist levels of detecting something's up with me, but I'd appreciate at least a <em>little</em> suspicion, please! The other two assistants have been side-eyeing me from here to kingdom come, but Kunikida? Noooo, he's just happy that his boyfriend is being <em>helpful</em>. He's pleased and proud and stressed out all the damn time, but that stress isn't coming from me! Or if it is, he's worried about me! He isn't scared of me <em>at all</em>, not even a <em>little</em> bit, and the only person who actually <em>is</em> scared, is Nakahara <em>fucking</em> Chuuya, who's response to fear is to <em>set things on fire!</em> Do you know how hard it is to get set on <em>fucking</em> fire and be like, ohoho, what a normal day this is! I don't notice anything wrong at <em>all</em>, meanwhile you are using every trick in the God damned <em>book</em> to keep the other people from noticing, you've been lit <em>on fire</em>, and you're not dying! That was my life, Dazai! For <em>two months</em>! And he keeps coming around, to see if I've turned back into you, and he keeps setting me on fire! On fire! And one of these days I'm gonna get unlucky and someone will notice, or something else will catch on fire and I'm not going to be able to put it out, and then where will we be?"</p><p>"oN FIrE," Dazai replied, sounding amused. "anD YEs, I sAw tHE CHiBi'S reACtiOn. iT waS vERy fUNNy."</p><p>"You <em>saw</em> and you didn't <em>help me</em>?" Tanizaki exclaimed.</p><p>Dazai shrugged. "iT hURT. beSIdEs, If tHe chIbI sAw mE, ThE jOKe wOuLd Be OvEr."</p><p>"He <em>set me on fire</em>!"</p><p>"tHAt waS fuNNy toO."</p><p>Tanizaki made a sad whining noise, and Ango muffled a chuckle.</p><p> </p><p>Tanizaki and Dazai had ended up talking for hours, and Ango couldn't help but feel glad for them. It seemed the other monster had given Dazai something he could not, and he remembered how Tanizaki had said it was probably the only other being in the world who understood what Dazai was going through. And if it's encouragment got Dazai out of the house for a day to visit its siblings, letting Ango revel in the all-encompassing Loneliness once again...</p><p>Well. Everyone got something out of this bargain. And even though the loneliness faded when Dazai returned, Ango decided it was worth it, because his friend was smiling again.</p><p>(He still made him keep the young Hunt and Slaughter avatars away from him, though. While Dazai may have been the exception to his Loneliness, the two kids were <em>not</em>.)</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I might put a second chapter with Ango and Chuuya's POV of meeting Distortion!Dazai and Tanizaki respectively, but I'm not sure yet :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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